#transformationtuesday....still loading

There are a lot of these floating around the internet right now. And in simplicity they seem positive and motivational, but can I ask everyone to start sharing how these photos make them feel? Yes I said it- feel, I want to discuss the feelings behind these 2 dimensional snapshots, because I’m pretty sure emotions and feelings matter in eating disorder recovery.

Before you share a before and after picture of yourself in your eating disorder, ask yourself a couple of questions- Who is this picture for? What are you trying to show? Why is showing a picture important?

Do you see where I’m going with this?

We have all seen them, the emaciated/ unhealthy/ sad before pictures, and then the healthy/ weight restored smiling after picture. Photos side by side as a clear indicator that an eating disorder is truly beaten. Right? So why am I even questioning this?

But if you have been reading carefully, and following my posts, you may start to get on board with me and question this a little now, and maybe, just maybe, you are inquiring about the feelings too.

Just because the weight is restored, are the thoughts stable? Are the behaviors gone? Is the person’s body happy at this weight, i.e. are they truly eating enough and nourishing themselves? And what about eating disorders where weight gain is not the biggest factor, but healthier thoughts, eradicating behaviors, and stabilizing weight and healthy eating habits are the goal? How can that be measured in a before and after photo?

Now do you see where I’m going with this?

When you view these before and after pictures, how do they make you feel?

Do those pictures motivate your recovery or do they in fact motivate your disorder??

Do they leave you feeling triggered?

Do they leave you missing an eating disorder, missing something/ an idea of something that never really existed?

I think you’re following me.

There is no one static ‘before’ picture that exemplifies all that is an eating disorder, just like there is no one static ‘after’ picture that can show what true mental and physical recovery is. And when you are searching for motivation, searching for inspiration- seeing triggering photos and comparing yourself is the last thing recommended for a healthy recovery.

I want to make it clear, that I am not saying there is intended malice in photos that are placed out there. I am not saying we should not praise weight gain- because we should. But I am saying weight gain is not the only factor in recovery. Recovery can not be measured in one solid picture and in reality there is no one ‘after’ picture.

Recovery is a process. Yes there may be a day where you sit there thinking, this body, this mind, they are both recovered….but does a picture do it justice? Just think about it. And if there is a stronger way to tell your story, a positive way without focus on the physical body, an inspirational way to focus on qualities of recovery, I’m pretty sure that’s an amazing after photo I’d rather see.